Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
