I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Randomize
