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he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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