so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
