At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Randomize
