so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
