how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
vagina is talking i cant
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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