I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Dicks are not precious.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize