She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
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