I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Randomize
