No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
