you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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