If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
ttyl tear gas
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Randomize
