I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I just blew my weed a kiss
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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