well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
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