wakey wakey hands off snakey
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
jump out the window naked night went bad
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
