So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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