I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
