Capitaan dildo arrescate!
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize