u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize