Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
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