Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Randomize
