they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize