That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
