I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Randomize
