I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I see more hoeing in ur future
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
