Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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