I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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