Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Randomize