What did we do last night that was yellow?
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
