i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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