Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
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