Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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