Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Is it penis luge time yet?
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
