Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
