drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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