i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
