this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
