I just saw a hot homeless man
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
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