My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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