her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize
