Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
