Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
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