We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Randomize
