fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Randomize
