I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
