i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
The struggles of a small town man whore
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
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