Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
