Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize