so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
